Jesus and the Five Year Plan
Acapella Vibes
Last year I went to see my friends’ band at the Casbah in San Diego.
The band is called Night Moves and they were on tour from Minneapolis, where I once lived.
They are awesome and you should go listen to them!1
Night Moves, the lucky bastards, are on Domino Records, which might be the coolest label on earth right now, and they sold the place out.
I was wearing a Green Bay Packers hat that night at the Casbah and some fellow who was from Wisconsin struck up a conversation with me based on our mutual love of the Pack.2
Eventually, he asked what my five year plan was.
I told him I didn’t really have one.
He was incredulous.
“Come on, you gotta have some kind of five year plan!?” he argued.
I’ve never conciously made a five year plan.
“Not dying, I reckon. Keep living, writing songs, watching my kids grow up?” I offered.
We parted ways amicably and enjoyed the rest of the show.
But I remember a little thought popping into my head at the time: Jesus never had a five year plan.
And then on May 17, 2024, that thought popped back in the form of a song, which I recorded into my phone and present to you today, as track 11 on Volume 9 of “From the Mixed Up Files of Mr. Matthew T. Schindler.” Give it a listen for free in the player below.
Do you remember that kind of 7th grade thing where somebody would yell “JOHNSON!” into a room full of people and then when Johnson looked up, the yeller would skip a beat and then say, kind of sing-song/deadpan “suuucks.”
When I played this demo for my kids in the car while driving them to school not long ago, my daughter did a little version of that, albeit unintentionally.
She said “This song!………….suuucks!”
Not the reaction I was hoping for, but we can’t win ‘em all.3
It is nice to have critics who give unfilitered reactions to one’s art.
I happen to disagree with this critic; I think this one is a banger that’s going to make me a bunch of money—so much money in fact, that I might have to make a five year plan just to figure out how to spend it all.4
I remain your humble servant,
OX&C
Faux Jean
Here are the lyrics:
There was a man named Jesus,
and Jesus there was a man
Yes, he was a grown ass man
And he never made a five year plan
So try to be more like Jesus
Stop trying to control time,
Try to be more like Jesus
And have faith that the world will be fine
Jesus was a grown ass man and he never made a five year plan
Immediately after listening to today’s song addition to the Mixed Up Files lol
I try not to watch too much football nowadays as I convinced myself that I was going to die of a heart attack some Sunday afternoon because of a missed field goal or some such thing.
There is a version with guitar that was less reviled that I will share shortly.
manifesting.